英文簡歷中致命的大錯

    時間:2024-08-26 19:35:13 簡歷模板 我要投稿
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    英文簡歷中致命的大錯

           致命的大錯:“Finished 8th in my high school graduating class of 10.”
      “Qualifications: No education or experience.”
      “I am relatively intelligent, obedient and loyal as a puppy.”
      “My compensation should be at least equal to my age.”
      “Reason for Leaving: It had to do with the IRS, FBI and SEC.”
      “Fired because I fought for lower pay.”
      “Size of employer: Very tall, probably over 65”
      “Please disregard the enclosed resume-it is terribly out of date.”
      “Reason for Leaving: My boss said the end of the world is near.”
      “Reason for Leaving: The owner gave new meaning to the word paranoia. I prefer to elaborate privately.”
      打字錯誤與語法錯誤:
      “Here are my qualifications for you to overlook.”
      “Strengths: Ability to meet deadlines while maintaining composer.”
      “I am a rabid typist.”
      “Work History: Performed brain wave tests,1879-1981.”
      “After receiving advice from several different angels, I have decided to pursue a new line of work.”
      “Accounting cleric.”
                   “As indicted, I have over five years of experience analyzing investments.”
      “Suspected to graduate early next year.”
      “Disposed of $2.5 billion in assets.”
      “Proven ability to track down and correct erors.”
      “Accomplishments: Oversight of entire department.”
      “Am a perfectionist and rarely if if ever forget details.”
      “Accomplishments: Completed 11 years of high school.”
      不應(yīng)有的幽默:
      “Note: Keep this resume on top of the stack. Use all others to heat your house.”
      “Assisted in daily preparation of large quantities of consumable items in a fast-paced setting.” (Translation: Short-order cook.)
      “But wait...theres more. You get all this business knowledge plus a grasp of marketing that is second nature.”
      “I have an excellent track record, although I am not a horse.”
      “My fortune cookie said, Your next interview will result in a job-and I like your company in particular.”
      “Title: Another resume from the Profiles in Excellence series.”
      “Also Known As: Mr. Productivity, Mr. Clever, Mr.Fix-it.”
      “Trustworthy references available upon request-if I give them a few bucks.”
      “Lets meet so you can ooh and ahh over my experience.”

    英文簡歷中致命的大錯

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